I am having a serious case of the “uns” these days.
Unsatisfied.
Unfulfilled.
Undesirable.
You name it and I feel “un” it.
I’ve never had particularly high self-esteem, so when I start feeling even one of these things coming on, it seems like a whole slew of them rush right in and link themselves to one another, forming a mighty chain that holds me prisoner.
A speaker at my church recently said,
“Your perspective is your reality.”
I had to think about that for more than a minute.
She didn’t say your perspective IS reality…thank goodness for that.
She didn’t say that someone else’s perspective is reality (yours or otherwise)…thank goodness for that, too. I’ve had enough people in my life try to push their “reality” onto me of what I should/shouldn’t be or should/shouldn’t do.
She said YOUR perspective is YOUR reality…I’m not particularly thankful for that, but it helps explain a few things. Back to the “uns”.
I began to think about my perspective of life. What am I seeing in the mirror? And why is it nearly all negative? I couldn't really come up with anything earth-shattering, so I decided to take a look at the definitions some of my “uns” from their root word:
Satisfy – to please, to gratify, to be adequate.
I feel unsatisfied – I do not feel adequate.
Fulfill – to meet the requirements of; to measure up; to develop the full potentialities of.
I feel unfilled – I do not feel like I measure up or meet my full potential.
Desirable – having pleasing qualities; attractive; worth seeking.
I feel undesirable – I do not feel pleasing, attractive, worthy.
As I re-read those things, it makes me a little sad – but mostly it makes me really mad. It makes me mad at the people in my past (particularly when I was a child) who fed me those lies as if they were truth on a daily basis. And it makes me even madder at myself as an adult for continuing to buy into those lies, allowing myself to take to heart things that, according to my belief in and relationship with God, are simply not true.
That’s not to say that I can just turn off my feelings and turn off all those messages in my head that play over and over. I’m the first one to tell you that it’s just not that easy. And anyone who tells you it is…they are in a great deal of denial themselves. There are things that you don’t just “get over” with the snap of your fingers.
In order for me to successfully ward off all those lies, I have to dig in and seek the truth of who I am – of who God made me to be. I have to tell myself the truth every day…maybe even every hour. I have to counter the lies and make a new perspective for myself – a new reality.
So…
To the lie that I am unsatisfied…I will seek satisfaction in the things pleasing to God, not the things pleasing to man.
To the lie that I am unfulfilled…I will stop comparing myself to other people and I will stop “settling for” when things get too hard. I have been created by God to be ME and to do MY own part in His plan.
But now God has set the members, each one of them, in the body just as He pleased. And if they were all one member, where would the body be? - 1 Cor 12:18-19
To the lie that I am undesirable…I will remember that God chose me; God made me in His image; and God sent His only Son to die for me – because He finds me worthy; because He loves me.
So God created man in His own image - Gen 1:27
For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. - John 3:16
I recognize that we all have our own beliefs and our own methods of seeking truth. I also realize that it is all too easy to just give up and give in to the lies. Seeking truth and applying it is hard work. It’s often painful work. But in the end, we become better people for it…not just for ourselves, but for the hurting and broken world around us.
In the end, there IS one “un” that I am going to work diligently to attain and keep, and that is UNCHAINED.
What lies are you believing? Will you continue to let them keep you chained? If not, what are you willing to do to be free of them?
2 comments:
This is an excellent blog and our reality is our perspective it's how we see things, now we must change and see how God sees it. Thanks for sharing.
Hello Ms. Desiray! I apologize for the lateness in responding...I've gotten so behind in things around here and I'm working on getting back on track. You are SO right about changing the way we see things through the eyes of God. Boy, is it hard, sometimes! Especially in those instances where someone has either hurt me or really ticked me off. Hope you're having a very blessed day!
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